he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Randomize
