I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
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