Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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