Her vagina should come with caution tape.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Randomize