Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
We left an ass print on the piano.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize
