I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize
