I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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