I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
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