But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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