NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
