Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
Eric just called. Says he's trapped in a cul de sac because the road disappeared. Wants me to tell him what street has the bushes that whisper sweet nothings into you ear and the wobbling purple pokemon. Oh, and a "bigger and better" penis is growing out of his belly button. He took shrooms by the way.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
you win again, gameday.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
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