Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Randomize
