Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Randomize
