Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Randomize
