i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
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