i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
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