White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
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