there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
