i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
false alarm. still invincible.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Randomize