"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
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