Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Randomize