Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
