that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
