I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
