8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
