**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
