WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
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