have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
