You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Randomize
