Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
