I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
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