I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
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