His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
Please don't give away my fajitas
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize
