if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
