Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize