We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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