You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Randomize
