im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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