Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
