If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Randomize
