Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I smell stomach acid.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
Randomize