i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Randomize
