Just fell off a train. Bad.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
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