this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
You smell like stripper and shame
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
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