She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
You did what with his pubic hair?
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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