I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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