They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
I see more hoeing in ur future
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
Randomize
