Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
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