I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Randomize
