Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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